I have an extraordinarily important, loving book to share with you today. This Sure Thing, written by Sarah Mayfield and illustrated by Dennis Auth, relates the story of grief and love in a family. The younger brother has passed away, and the older brother and family find ways to cope with grief, adjustment, and continuing living with such love.

There are few resources for kids about grief. This is an incredibly important and powerful book that can truly help families who are grieving.

The illustrations are filled with joy, showing a family that includes the brother in daily life.

There are resources at the back to help continue bonds with the deceased, including letters to youth and adult readers, a list of thirty ways to live that love, and some today notes templates to remind ourselves of their presence in our lives. Mayfield also has an online bereavement community that you are invited to participate in, called Live That Love.

Highly, highly recommended.

Sarah Mayfield struggled to find informed grief services for her son, Bradley, after the death of his brother, Elliot. Today, Sarah’s passion is supporting bereaved youth and families while promoting grief awareness.  

Sarah is a Compassionate Bereavement Care™ Certified Provider, is Certified in Thanatology (Association for Death Education and Counseling) and has been a Nationally Certified Counselor since 2007. She earned both a Bachelor of Arts and Master of Counselor Education from the University of Virginia.  

In her previous nine years as an elementary school counselor, Sarah loved reading picture books aloud to classes on the carpet. It was through the students’ reactions to these books that she discovered a passion for an earnest message packaged in a confident, rewarding rhythm.

Personally, Sarah finds joy in upcycling forsaken furniture, getting lost in the plants (and weeds) of her yard, dancing unapologetically in the kitchen with her husband and kids, and remembering the motto, “Love never fails.”

We were lucky enough to sit down and chat with Mayfield, and ask her about the book, inspiration, how families and educators can use the book, and more. Here's what she had to say...

Please tell us about your new book, This Sure Thing...
This Sure Thing is a tribute to my living son, Bradley, for what he endured (and continues to endure) after the death of his younger brother, Elliot. Moreover, This Sure Thing is a book honoring every youth who has known loss far too soon. 

I watched Bradley grieve his brother. Bradley's grief looked different from what adults often expect. From the outside, Bradley's grief was easy to minimize or overlook. But, of course, his own mom saw the anger, the night terrors, the refusal to do previously shared activities, the sadness.

I was also the one to hear, "He's so young he won't remember." And, "Kids are resilient, he'll be fine." That is, the (well-intentioned, but) disenfranchising comments about childhood grief.

With This Sure Thing, I wanted to depict a youth living with grief and let readers (young and old) interpret their take. I don't want to tell readers what grief is or how it should look. Grief is incredibly personal and varied. I just wanted to show a story.

What led you to write this book?
My son, Elliot, died suddenly and unexpectedly at 1.5 years in 2018. My living son, Bradley, was almost 4 years old when his brother died. Bradley's brother and playmate just disappeared. It is incredibly heartbreaking to grieve your dead child. It is a special kind of torture to grieve your dead child while watching your living child grieve. 

In those early months and years, people recommended journaling or writing after Elliot's death. I could never bring myself to it...the pressure felt too immense. After all, how could I possibly reflect, in mere words, the heartbreak and love for my sons--both here and not? 

Cut to January 3, 2023, nearly 5 years after Elliot's death. Something came over me, and I had this intense drive to write. I'm still not sure what it was. I've not experienced anything quite like it--writing feverishly and passionately about a specific idea. I kept it secret for two days as I stole away to the guest room and sat there, measuring out meter and rhyme on a legal pad. 

How can families and educators utilize this book and the Today Notes in discussions about our loved ones who have died?
I wanted to depict truth--a lived experience. I also wanted readers, both young and old, to take home personal meaning. I hope the book offers both an individual and collective exploration of grief. That is, I hope both youth and adults glean something, personally, from reading, but I also hope the family, at large, gains something.

Regarding educators, we know that current grief models support continuing bonds with the deceased. In most cases, an ongoing relationship with our loved ones who have died is healthy and can be beneficial to healing and meaning-making. 

Regarding families, this book is hopefully a conversation starter about how we can remain connected to our loved ones after their death. Not only is it okay to think about and remember our loved ones, but it is also okay to actively do things in memory of them, like writing to our loved ones as the Today Notes suggest! There is richness and importance in ritual--it is an outward expression of the inward and offers grievers the chance to show their grief and their love.

What other grief resources do you recommend for families? 
National Alliance for Children's Grief: https://nacg.org/
What's Your Grief: https://whatsyourgrief.com/
Live That Love: https://www.livethatlove.com/ 

The illustrations in the book are filled with such love and poignancy. Can you please tell us more about your illustrator, Dennis Auth, and how you worked together?
I found Dennis Auth through my publisher, Brandylane Publishers, illustrator database. I wanted hand-drawn illustrations, and I was envisioning the book being in black and white. I just love hand-drawn black and white illustrations! Dennis agreed to the project and took such great care bringing to life the visualizations in my head. I described what I'd like an illustration to show, and Dennis would run with each one. The coolest thing is Dennis modeled the lead character after my living son, and one picture I sent to him. Dennis attended the book launch I remember seeing a tear in his eye as we talked about the meaningfulness of the book. I'll never forget that, and I think it speaks to the level of care he invested, for which my family and I are so grateful.

What's up next for you? 
I love the work I do as a counselor working with both grieving youth and adults. I foresee this work as an ongoing mission in the future. I also find working with support groups meaningful--I currently volunteer once a month as a support group facilitator with bereaved parents.

I have an idea for a sister story to This Sure Thing...literally a sister story as it is about my son's sister. Grace has some non-death losses of her own, and I would love the opportunity to work on this story and help other children and families with a similar experience.

How can people find your work? 
https://www.livethatlove.com/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/sarah-mayfield-med-ncc-ct-206633247/
https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100073560866174