An introvert is a shy, reticent person. I did not readily accept my fate as an introvert until I went abroad. I knew I often needed time away from the crowd to recharge, but I thought everyone did that. My freshman year of college, I was explaining this to a friend (an extrovert, oy) and she said “Oh. You’re an introvert, Steph.”

What?

Is that bad? Is there medication for it?

“It’s all goood,” she said loudly, a typical extrovert answer.

About a year later, I found myself in the middle of Santiago among Chileans, who are mostly not introverts. There are introverts everywhere, but I knowingly accept that each culture fosters their environments uniquely, thus introvert travelers have to learn to adapt constantly. 

My first month in Chile, I spent a lot of my down time in my room, writing and listening to music. My amazing host mom thought I was sad and vehemently knocked on my door with food every hour. In my broken Castellano (Chilean Spanish), I tried to explain to her that I was not tired, menstruating, or homesick. I was not homesick. In many ways, being sick of home led me to study abroad. I ached for a change of environment and yearned for an atmosphere to force myself to grow.

It has been ten months since I lived in South America and I can finally share some strides with fellow introverts:

Make Friends

I am so lucky to have traveled with exceptional friends. But in a group of almost 20 people, soon there were circles and helpful categories of friends in my mind. Some friends I shared memes with, others I cooked with on overnight trips, and still others I went to for advice on which classes to take. You remember the first day of kindergarten when you met your best friend and you instantly knew that you would be best super best friends cross your heart and hope to die? Well, that never happened to me, because friendships take time, even more so with some introverts. Abroad, I grew close to three friends whom I got to know very well. They became my cornerstones - friends who laughed at my “horribly cringing Spanish,” cried with me when I woke up angry and bitter on November 9th, friends who, in turn, leaned on me through their homesick episodes. Make friends because they will ground you - and traveling is exponentially exciting with a crew!

Go At Your Own Pace

This motto especially reminds me of my time in Argentina where we saw the Floralis Generica. Located in the heart of Buenos Aires, it was one of the first sights we saw. Its author, architect Eduardo Catalano, created this structure made of stainless steel and aluminum that perfectly reflects the sun on a shiny day. As we approached the flower, I remember screaming “I found the metal thingy.” I knew that the flower was metal, but I did not know that it would be this big, as the petals span over 30 meters wide when the flower is open. Naively, I suggested that we use this “huge metal thingy” to locate ourselves and walk the distance to the metal flower. But, thankfully, I have great friends who don’t laugh at me when I am exhausted and dehydrated. As we got closer, I realized my mistake: the huge metal thingy was the flower. The humongous flower is conveniently located in the United Nations Plaza and continues to be one of the must-see sights in Buenos Aires since 2002. This is no ordinary flower; the petals are closed in the evening and they open again in the morning to get energy from the Sun.

As introverts, we, too, have power over when we open and close our petals to the rest of the world. And we open them when we are ready, recharged, and happy to begin climbing again. 

If you need time to recuperate and journal after Machu Picchu, take it! You need a day before Uruguay to run and listen to music? Yes, please.

This flower, this wonderful, breath-taking, one-of-a-kind flower, was designed to let the world in at specific times. How much so for you and me? It is your journey at your own pace.

Forgive Yourself

You have to forgive yourself for the mistakes that you will make. Learn to forgive yourself now and practice forgiving yourself until you never forget that you are a work in progress. You will not magically find the balance of going at your own pace on your first traveling trip. Forgive yourself. You will burn out trying to keep up with the team. Forgive yourself. Many times, you will go out for drinks and become tangibly overwhelmed. Forgive yourself. 

Some days, the very act of getting out of bed is revolutionary. As an introvert, I know the most challenging form I can take is being a world-trekker, and adventurer, and an explorer. But I have to learn to recharge and go at my own pace, and I have to cling to friends who appreciate that necessity. I’m a better traveler, person, and friend when I acknowledge that I am an introvert. Traveling is the one of the most challenging and beautiful things I have ever done, and I suspect that that will never change.

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Stephane Alexandre is the Intercultural Immersion Editor for Wandering Educators. She studied abroad in Chile and graduated from Tufts University this past May. She is very passionate about creating opportunities for young people to travel and explore the world around them. She has traveled to ten countries engaging in new cultures ranging from studying abroad in Chile and leading a genocide education program in Rwanda. She sincerely believes that young people achieve greater goals when they create global connections that enable them to be active citizens in all corners of the world.

All photos courtesy and copyright Stephane Alexandre